Jan. 27th, 2009

polerin: My shadow on a wall (Default)
When I first heard the song, "If I Were a Boy" I was troubled by it. I understood the words, and I understood a bit of why she felt the way she does, having seen friends do it to their wives or partners. But something about it bugged me, like she wasn't saying enough, wasn't pushing hard enough to make that point.

I think it's in part because for the first time in my life I'm having to defend my body from male speculation. Some of it centers around the fact that I'm trans, but all of it is because my body and social status is that of a woman. I don't know if I'm having to push back harder than if I weren't trans, or weren't a lesbian, but I know I wanted more from the song.

I wanted something to hit that presumption of how women are supposed to act and be ok with whatever men want to say about us.

I wanted this.

It won't embed, but it will definitely play, and I think you should watch it before you read the rest of this post.


...


I wonder if the gut level reaction I had to the first few minutes of the video, sympathy for his heartbreak and for his unsuccessful efforts is partially because men are so rarely portrayed in that manner, and are not rewarded socially if they act that way. In reality, the guys who wanted him to come out with them after work would likely have been making jokes about how he was pussywhipped, or any number of other things.

I think the "transition" from her imagination to reality should have come at the very end of the song if at all, but overall.. one of the more powerful videos about gender roles and the pain they cause in a long time.
polerin: My shadow on a wall (monkey)
Very cute, with some very funny cameos.

I've not been taking enough time to just be with Lissa lately, so we curled up on the couch and giggled at the silly together. It's not a challenging or deep movie, but it is cute, gentle, and has some really great humor that doesn't give me all kinds of embarrassment squick, which is very, very, very unusual.

Anyone else seen it?

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polerin: My shadow on a wall (Default)
polerin

November 2009

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